When exposed to (emotional or physical) trauma the body deploys its own defense system. From the FIRST second the brain receives the signal that a catastrophe has occurred. The blood rushes to the organ that needs help the most. Blood flows to the muscles. To the organs. To the brain. The brain then makes a decision for the rest of the body. Either face the danger or run away. It is a mechanism designed to protect the body from harm. We call it shock. I think I am coming to the realization that I live my life in a constant state of shock. Everyday I choose to stay and face the danger. The memories. The flash backs. The constant fear. It never goes away. I even think the older Mason gets the more terrifying losing him is. I honestly am so exhausted from the sheer thought. I don't know how I could live in this world should one of my children leave it. Y’all are too gracious with me. (YES I said Y'all. I am trying to keep it light. For me